Do we try and keep the memories of the past alive through music? Do we visit old places to feel what we once did? The nostalgia can sometimes take your breath away. When i feel hurt or my new life isn't quite how it should be, i take comfort in the fact that at one time what i felt was so strong and real, beyond the blue i can feel that. Voices, laughs, fun times, bad times and how when you look back, the present never seems to measure up to the past. But I'm glad i came back from several dark places, each time a new chapter in my life story begins, new memories, new places, new songs...all in the hopes this time it will not become 'The Past'
Showing posts with label Lola. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lola. Show all posts
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Friday, August 31, 2012
Just Words
I sing you to sleep, my dear
You're weeping gently unto yourself, your arms thin, tangled in mine...
You hair trails in whisps around your face, laying gently across your pale skin
Tears have ceased and now just the odd spasm of emotion
I sing you to sleep.
Breathing as though my heart is broken
My soul is ruptured as it collides with yours
Your maleficent grace.
Nails rip into the curve of my arm, peeling back shreds of skin
and you howl...long, deep and torrid.
I squeeze you tight, almost crushing you
I feel you tense up, hear the long and drawn out breath
I suck in and gasp, 'No stop...' i whisper 'There's really no need...'
Your body curls up, your knees under your breasts...You tuck your head in close
Feeling the bones of your spine against me and one by one they begin to break,
Falling apart, tearing, your skin opens up as though ripe fruit and you scream.
How can one in so much pain survive? no wait, it's a dream.
You are with me, laughing, you roll on the grass, dragging me with you
Standing up tall you raise your arms in the air and spin, laughing...
'Listen to the waves!' you call out...sighing deeply 'Just listen to the waves...'
You turn to me, your eyes filled with tears, as one rolls helplessly down your cheek...
You hurriedly brush it away with the back of your hand and i look to you.
'I love you, you know...'
You nod, then turn away...folding your arms in front of you, you look out onto the sunset,
I pull myself up and shuffle towards you, lingering my your hip, glancing up at you.
'I'm here' i whisper and i see the knife in your hand.
Blood flows like pain, it courses quickly and has no mercy
Gushing onto the earth and seeping into the dirt, no remorse
The skies turn a vibrant red and the clouds speed up, racing across the skyline
The small guttural noises i make don't bring me any hope,
I stare coldly at your feet as they walk way, i hear your child like voice singing as you leave...
You dance in circles, your long hair trails around your body in some kind of slowed down motion...
No more tears.
I roll onto my back and stare up at the sky, my hand covers my wound, fingers digging into flesh
The hole where it had been.
I close my eyes and listen...no beating.
I close my mind and search...
I close...
You're weeping gently unto yourself, your arms thin, tangled in mine...
You hair trails in whisps around your face, laying gently across your pale skin
Tears have ceased and now just the odd spasm of emotion
I sing you to sleep.
Breathing as though my heart is broken
My soul is ruptured as it collides with yours
Your maleficent grace.
Nails rip into the curve of my arm, peeling back shreds of skin
and you howl...long, deep and torrid.
I squeeze you tight, almost crushing you
I feel you tense up, hear the long and drawn out breath
I suck in and gasp, 'No stop...' i whisper 'There's really no need...'
Your body curls up, your knees under your breasts...You tuck your head in close
Feeling the bones of your spine against me and one by one they begin to break,
Falling apart, tearing, your skin opens up as though ripe fruit and you scream.
How can one in so much pain survive? no wait, it's a dream.
You are with me, laughing, you roll on the grass, dragging me with you
Standing up tall you raise your arms in the air and spin, laughing...
'Listen to the waves!' you call out...sighing deeply 'Just listen to the waves...'
You turn to me, your eyes filled with tears, as one rolls helplessly down your cheek...
You hurriedly brush it away with the back of your hand and i look to you.
'I love you, you know...'
You nod, then turn away...folding your arms in front of you, you look out onto the sunset,
I pull myself up and shuffle towards you, lingering my your hip, glancing up at you.
'I'm here' i whisper and i see the knife in your hand.
Blood flows like pain, it courses quickly and has no mercy
Gushing onto the earth and seeping into the dirt, no remorse
The skies turn a vibrant red and the clouds speed up, racing across the skyline
The small guttural noises i make don't bring me any hope,
I stare coldly at your feet as they walk way, i hear your child like voice singing as you leave...
You dance in circles, your long hair trails around your body in some kind of slowed down motion...
No more tears.
I roll onto my back and stare up at the sky, my hand covers my wound, fingers digging into flesh
The hole where it had been.
I close my eyes and listen...no beating.
I close my mind and search...
I close...
Thursday, August 9, 2012
Coffee Break Read ~By Lola~
I have been wandering down this road, it is a lane, there are tall trees on either side all the way down as far as the eye can see, the sunlight filters through them making the edges almost glow with a soft ambiance, the leaves look like transparent gold and some of the light spills onto the path, spreading it’s gold dust further still. I wake up there as though I have woken from a dream, I can hear voices in the distance and also the thud of loud music very far away, I hear children playing, letting out shrieks of delight, the sound of parents whooping together loudly, the sounds of teenagers in a playful argument, cussing each other and rolling around in the grass like young puppies. The air is warm and almost soulful and I take a few steps, hearing the gravel crunch under my feet. Curiously I stop and look through the trees at a clearing in the density, there I see a small child sitting, she is alone, her dark hair is pulled up on top of her head, she is sitting with her tiny legs crossed, surrounded in longish grass and meadow flowers, in her lap sits a small stuffed toy and as I approach I see she is playing with the ears, lifting them up and down and cocking her head from side to side as though copying the movements of the toy rabbit.
A branch breaks under my foot and it seem the loudest thing in the world, the little girl is startled and she looks at my quickly, her eyes narrowing for a second, then she looks down at her toy rabbit and I hear her say ‘Bunny is sick’
I wonder for a second whether to get closer, I carefully take two or three steps ‘Oh?’ I say in a soft voice, the girl nodded without looking at me, I stepped closer,
‘What is wrong with him?’ i ask... she looked at me quickly and pouted ‘Bunny is a girl’ she held her up to me ‘Look!’ snapped the tiny girl.
I wonder for a second whether to get closer, I carefully take two or three steps ‘Oh?’ I say in a soft voice, the girl nodded without looking at me, I stepped closer,
‘What is wrong with him?’ i ask... she looked at me quickly and pouted ‘Bunny is a girl’ she held her up to me ‘Look!’ snapped the tiny girl.
The rabbit was indeed sick, she had a huge rip down the centre of her chest, as if someone had taken a knife and ragged it down and the stuffing was half pulled out. I grimaced at sucked in my breath for a moment and sighed ‘Oh dear...how did that happen?’ the little girl was quiet for a second as she carried on playing with the ears, twisting them around and pulling them from side to side with her little fingers, she hummed for a second or so the stopped, going very still as though choosing her words carefully, she looked at me again, her eyes squinting in the half light
‘Can you fix her?’ she said
‘Can you fix her?’ she said
The words seem to echo in my mind for a second, as if it stirred something inside me, my stomach turned slightly and I furrowed my brow, not enjoying the odd feeling, the wind blew gently against my arm, making the hairs stand up on end and it travelled up to the nape of my neck, I shivered slightly.
The girl was still looking at me, a questioning look in her eyes, I moved towards her and crouched down next to her, looking down at her tiny thin fingers and I sighed ‘Hunny, why are here alone? Where are your parents?'
’The girl replied almost immediately ‘I don’t have any Mom or Dad’
We went silent for a second, not an awkward silence, just something in between sorrow and questioning, how was this girl all alone here? She was soft like an angel, her voice was quiet and almost sad, yet still child like...I felt that feeling again inside me, like a feeling of loss.
I sat down in the grass, the little girl looked at me and smiled, her eyes turning into tiny rainbow shapes, they looked up to my hair ‘You’re hair is really pretty’ she giggled ‘I wish I had my hair pink...I really like pink it’s my favourite’ her voice was all tinklely and sweet a she laughed at her own words, I couldn’t help smiling ‘Why thank you little Miss’ I said with a laugh ‘Maybe one day when you grow up- you can have it pink too! ..But I’ll tell ya a secret...’ I took my voice down to a half whisper ‘People sometimes may think you’re a little crazy’ a did a goofy stern face at her and laughed as she burst out laughing, her little laughs echoing around the quiet forest.
After a few minutes of quiet, the little girl asked me my name, ‘My name is Lola’ I replied with a smile and I was shocked to discover that we shared the same name ‘So I will have to call you little Lola’ I laughed ‘Otherwise it could get confusing’ we agreed on that and I shook her tiny little hand, she smiled broadly and nodded her little head....
To be continued...
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Role Play...Can it Push Boundaries?
I was recently in a conversation with an old friend in SL whom i hadn't seen for a while, we caught up over prim Starbucks & poor sipping animations in a diner on the New York sim, it was a nice hour or so and we mused over old times and past relationships, we laughed and joked and it was nice to have a connection with someone who held quite a bit of my history. We soon shifted onto some of the contents of my picks in my profile, she had spotted during a nose that i had several picks relating to role play, she hummed and hared over quizzing me about it and finally i just said to her 'You think it's weird don't you'
She laughed and said no, she explained how she does not entirely understand it and wondered if its any different from the kind of antics you get up to in IM with a partner? 'No...well...yes, sort of' i said to her, It's different for everyone i'm guessing...but for me and many other people i know, it's that creative out let, it's a story unfolding and it can end in one chapter...or it can carry on for many, some even write whole books over the course of time with the same person...but when the story ends and you come out of character...that's it.
'So its a free and easy well for people to get laid guilt free then?' she snorts...i laughed at her bluntness, 'Its not always about sex' I tell her, plenty of people i know don't sexually RP, they may have some kind of romance or tease but like with real life, when things get too steamy there is always the word NO.
It would be arrogant of me to assume that all people who RP do it just for the sex, but such a large percentage do, not often for sinister reasons, but to have that fantasy, to be that gallant knight or that filthy pirate who chases the captains daughter as she flee's around the shipwreck, shrieking and trying to escape...when secretly hoping he catches her..oh and what if he also catches her sister who is hiding in the jungle? with all that rope he could quite easily tie then both up & they would be at his complete mercy!
My friend burst out laughing at this notion and suggested that i take her along to a carp sim one day...quickly adding that she was joking, as she is very happily partnered. So she then asked me...'What if feelings get involved?' Good question.
A friend who also RP's said to me that she is fed up of men assuming they were becoming romantically involved after they had got intimate during RP on a few occasions. I said, Well you just must be THAT GOOD! of course not too far from the truth as men seemed to fall all over her and she was merely interested only in creating stories with people. Were they right to get huffy? Mm not so sure...but on the other hand men and women have been sleeping together, no strings attached, since way back...and it has been the cause of so much drama...men sleeping with multiple women, women doing the same with men..people finding out...tears and tantrums...
So what if feelings DO get involved? Sometimes or often RP can be intense, fast, passionate,creative...i heard one session being described once as 'The whole room vanished and it was just me & him there, typing to each other like crazy...' It's like the first throws of love & passion, it can get your heart racing...so when its over?...do we just turn our feelings off? and what if then you know that its likely that person will be making some other persons heart thrash the next day, while you sit there and pout to yourself.
And what if it's one sided? YOU think it was amazing...out of this world...but the other person logs off and thinks..'Well that was aright i guess' i suppose we never know.
And then comes the big old question... Can we RP with close friends more than innocently?
A friend asked me straight up if i think that could affect our friendship...i was positive it would, not down to the fact i wasn't attracted to the person or cared about them, but because RP to me is fantasy, i can save those precious moments of being intimate with someone i like,and i mean REALLY like...remove myself and be with that person on a more whole level rather than it being the non consistent act of simple RP. So to be so casual with a friend will in my opinion, push boundaries.
I have the utmost respect for the NSRP'ers, it's something that can be a bit of a taboo on the carp sims, looked down on a little and questioned, it's simple really, as humans we are not all the same, we have our own needs and desires and we act accordingly to those...i am often in awe of the non sexual male who keeps to his word & says 'Thank you...but no' to the ladies...although its rare...it does happen! It says to me, a strong person with respect for himself and women...or maybe just very shy! (laughs out loud)
So in conclusion, i think that RP in its many forms can push boundaries, depending on the person ...
I don't think it at all right or acceptable for a person to literally walk away or cut out a previous player, it's polite and respectful to be gracious to that person, understanding to any feelings they may have...treat other players as they treat you, RP is after all a huge community based on communication...
It's all supposed to be fun...but don't forget that we are all humans behind the words guys :)
Peace Out
Lola
'So its a free and easy well for people to get laid guilt free then?' she snorts...i laughed at her bluntness, 'Its not always about sex' I tell her, plenty of people i know don't sexually RP, they may have some kind of romance or tease but like with real life, when things get too steamy there is always the word NO.
It would be arrogant of me to assume that all people who RP do it just for the sex, but such a large percentage do, not often for sinister reasons, but to have that fantasy, to be that gallant knight or that filthy pirate who chases the captains daughter as she flee's around the shipwreck, shrieking and trying to escape...when secretly hoping he catches her..oh and what if he also catches her sister who is hiding in the jungle? with all that rope he could quite easily tie then both up & they would be at his complete mercy!
My friend burst out laughing at this notion and suggested that i take her along to a carp sim one day...quickly adding that she was joking, as she is very happily partnered. So she then asked me...'What if feelings get involved?' Good question.
A friend who also RP's said to me that she is fed up of men assuming they were becoming romantically involved after they had got intimate during RP on a few occasions. I said, Well you just must be THAT GOOD! of course not too far from the truth as men seemed to fall all over her and she was merely interested only in creating stories with people. Were they right to get huffy? Mm not so sure...but on the other hand men and women have been sleeping together, no strings attached, since way back...and it has been the cause of so much drama...men sleeping with multiple women, women doing the same with men..people finding out...tears and tantrums...
So what if feelings DO get involved? Sometimes or often RP can be intense, fast, passionate,creative...i heard one session being described once as 'The whole room vanished and it was just me & him there, typing to each other like crazy...' It's like the first throws of love & passion, it can get your heart racing...so when its over?...do we just turn our feelings off? and what if then you know that its likely that person will be making some other persons heart thrash the next day, while you sit there and pout to yourself.
And what if it's one sided? YOU think it was amazing...out of this world...but the other person logs off and thinks..'Well that was aright i guess' i suppose we never know.
And then comes the big old question... Can we RP with close friends more than innocently?
A friend asked me straight up if i think that could affect our friendship...i was positive it would, not down to the fact i wasn't attracted to the person or cared about them, but because RP to me is fantasy, i can save those precious moments of being intimate with someone i like,and i mean REALLY like...remove myself and be with that person on a more whole level rather than it being the non consistent act of simple RP. So to be so casual with a friend will in my opinion, push boundaries.
I have the utmost respect for the NSRP'ers, it's something that can be a bit of a taboo on the carp sims, looked down on a little and questioned, it's simple really, as humans we are not all the same, we have our own needs and desires and we act accordingly to those...i am often in awe of the non sexual male who keeps to his word & says 'Thank you...but no' to the ladies...although its rare...it does happen! It says to me, a strong person with respect for himself and women...or maybe just very shy! (laughs out loud)
So in conclusion, i think that RP in its many forms can push boundaries, depending on the person ...
I don't think it at all right or acceptable for a person to literally walk away or cut out a previous player, it's polite and respectful to be gracious to that person, understanding to any feelings they may have...treat other players as they treat you, RP is after all a huge community based on communication...
It's all supposed to be fun...but don't forget that we are all humans behind the words guys :)
Peace Out
Lola
Friday, August 3, 2012
New Huntings ~ Mystical Sim Review
Well as everyone well knows, trying to find a suitable place to hunt, be hunted or to just make new friends this past few weeks has been somewhat a mission for most since the closing of our beloved home.
I took advantage of my new found free time and spent it exploring some of the few carp sims that SL has to offer. Now i took into consideration what many of us may want from their particular hang out...as for some, or many...it may not be just so much to do with the hunt but also to do with being with like-minded people with a shared interest, to practice sparring, to practice running, to meet someone, to role-play with close friends or a place to go with your master/mistress.
Each place i visited has similar rules regarding activity on the sim...some are more strict than others, some more lenient..some are so strict that its possibly better they don't have any general public there and just close the sim to specific VIP's.
It's always good to ask yourself what is your ideals regarding your hang out before you settle for one particular place, take time to observe the people there...are they friendly? are they all old friends? do they welcome new-comers willingly? is it mainly couples? is it switch orientated? has the sim been there long? it is established? Is it laggy often/always/sometimes? ...all obvious things to think about when you look at it but also important as finding a new place to settle is one of the hardest things to do in SL.
I often found myself visiting the same places over and over, between them and the Gor Hub which to me is one of the coldest places i have visited to date, but it enables you to find out about possible new places. I found myself visiting quite a few of the pretty Gor sims SL has to offer which in my opinion was far better than standing around in the hub its self which i found to be quite soul destroying.
So on my travels i came across this pretty little sim called Mystical Land Role Play of Sexual Pleasures . I was straight away welcomed by their non fussy approach to entering the actual sim, it was a literal case of join the group, stick your meter on...and TP down. The rules were simple and uncomplicated, Hunters & Prey could be either sex and also more mythical folk are more than welcome, the place is switch friendly & GM meters are used. On TP'ing down to the main sim...i was transported outside of a neat little comfortable safezone set within their little village of quaint little cottages on the edge of some forest land. The village is set out in the style of a working community, with its haylofts and gardening plots, neat little houses positioned carefully for privacy for the renters, a nice little dancing gazebo for couples, the dock where fish hang on hooks and its very much like working docks behind it sits a neat little tavern.
The left of the village is all dense woodland, you can plow through it, hide in it, relax in it, the textures are beautiful and uncomplicated and as you come out of the other side along the shoreline you see the huge castle overlooking the pretty lake, their cliffs sit to the left of that, running along side the actual safezone which consists of a comfortably cushioned area of gorean style with its central fire and an interesting cage hanging above! The colors are warm and inviting.
Over the cliffs or through the trees that sit slightly behind the safe-zone and village area there are all kinds of interesting things to be found. Its beautifully designed with its landscape and hills, bridges that lead to a volcano. the hills hide a number of caves and pathways, some so hidden that you find them by accident! There are endless private places to role play or snuggle up, you can leap across the rock face or charge underwater along the fast moving river that divides the landscape. It's green and lush with its open spaces and cool and shady in the woodland areas that hold all manner of naughtiness (winks)
I found the folk of Mystical very welcoming and friendly to newcomers, the environment is very laid back and people there just seem to be hanging out and enjoying each others company for the most part. This is key for me, as the social aspect is important without being bogged down by a group of unfriendly people and harsh rules, Mystical is in no way like this and i would recommend it to anyone! The hunting grounds are amazing, the rope-play equipment is of a very good standard and you can tell that a lot of work has gone into the sim that has been standing there for about a year now.
Mystical is hosting one of their regular scavenger hunts coming soon, There are many nice items to be won and a chance to meet people and see a little of what goes on...
Mystical has almost everything you could ask for in a carp sim...so go over and check it out!
http://slurl.com/secondlife/Garden%20of%20Stygia/130/168/3549
I took advantage of my new found free time and spent it exploring some of the few carp sims that SL has to offer. Now i took into consideration what many of us may want from their particular hang out...as for some, or many...it may not be just so much to do with the hunt but also to do with being with like-minded people with a shared interest, to practice sparring, to practice running, to meet someone, to role-play with close friends or a place to go with your master/mistress.
Each place i visited has similar rules regarding activity on the sim...some are more strict than others, some more lenient..some are so strict that its possibly better they don't have any general public there and just close the sim to specific VIP's.
It's always good to ask yourself what is your ideals regarding your hang out before you settle for one particular place, take time to observe the people there...are they friendly? are they all old friends? do they welcome new-comers willingly? is it mainly couples? is it switch orientated? has the sim been there long? it is established? Is it laggy often/always/sometimes? ...all obvious things to think about when you look at it but also important as finding a new place to settle is one of the hardest things to do in SL.
I often found myself visiting the same places over and over, between them and the Gor Hub which to me is one of the coldest places i have visited to date, but it enables you to find out about possible new places. I found myself visiting quite a few of the pretty Gor sims SL has to offer which in my opinion was far better than standing around in the hub its self which i found to be quite soul destroying.
So on my travels i came across this pretty little sim called Mystical Land Role Play of Sexual Pleasures . I was straight away welcomed by their non fussy approach to entering the actual sim, it was a literal case of join the group, stick your meter on...and TP down. The rules were simple and uncomplicated, Hunters & Prey could be either sex and also more mythical folk are more than welcome, the place is switch friendly & GM meters are used. On TP'ing down to the main sim...i was transported outside of a neat little comfortable safezone set within their little village of quaint little cottages on the edge of some forest land. The village is set out in the style of a working community, with its haylofts and gardening plots, neat little houses positioned carefully for privacy for the renters, a nice little dancing gazebo for couples, the dock where fish hang on hooks and its very much like working docks behind it sits a neat little tavern.
The left of the village is all dense woodland, you can plow through it, hide in it, relax in it, the textures are beautiful and uncomplicated and as you come out of the other side along the shoreline you see the huge castle overlooking the pretty lake, their cliffs sit to the left of that, running along side the actual safezone which consists of a comfortably cushioned area of gorean style with its central fire and an interesting cage hanging above! The colors are warm and inviting.
Over the cliffs or through the trees that sit slightly behind the safe-zone and village area there are all kinds of interesting things to be found. Its beautifully designed with its landscape and hills, bridges that lead to a volcano. the hills hide a number of caves and pathways, some so hidden that you find them by accident! There are endless private places to role play or snuggle up, you can leap across the rock face or charge underwater along the fast moving river that divides the landscape. It's green and lush with its open spaces and cool and shady in the woodland areas that hold all manner of naughtiness (winks)
I found the folk of Mystical very welcoming and friendly to newcomers, the environment is very laid back and people there just seem to be hanging out and enjoying each others company for the most part. This is key for me, as the social aspect is important without being bogged down by a group of unfriendly people and harsh rules, Mystical is in no way like this and i would recommend it to anyone! The hunting grounds are amazing, the rope-play equipment is of a very good standard and you can tell that a lot of work has gone into the sim that has been standing there for about a year now.
Mystical is hosting one of their regular scavenger hunts coming soon, There are many nice items to be won and a chance to meet people and see a little of what goes on...
Mystical has almost everything you could ask for in a carp sim...so go over and check it out!
http://slurl.com/secondlife/Garden%20of%20Stygia/130/168/3549
Saturday, July 7, 2012
Silky Prey
This is my first fashion post and i want to take this chance to review one of the amazing silks from Deviance. They are one of the best fantasy/role play outfitters on the market, they come at a price but they are truly beautiful. This one is 'Enchantress'
The textures are beautiful and it fits in all the right places. There is a choice of a few different looks for the detail on the jewels around the hips and it comes with resizing menu.
I rate these beautiful, slinky silks so get yourself to their store and grab yourself something sexy.
Lola
Deviance http://slurl.com/secondlife/Carnivale/74/128/31
[LeLutka] Hair 'Trend' Rigged Mesh http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/LeLutka/121/127/26
[Forge] Noir Collar https://marketplace.secondlife.com/p/Forge-Noir-Collar-Steel/3284940
The textures are beautiful and it fits in all the right places. There is a choice of a few different looks for the detail on the jewels around the hips and it comes with resizing menu.
I rate these beautiful, slinky silks so get yourself to their store and grab yourself something sexy.
Lola
Deviance http://slurl.com/secondlife/Carnivale/74/128/31
[LeLutka] Hair 'Trend' Rigged Mesh http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/LeLutka/121/127/26
[Forge] Noir Collar https://marketplace.secondlife.com/p/Forge-Noir-Collar-Steel/3284940
Friday, July 6, 2012
Getting To Know You
Nykkee Lola Tiamet Sophia
Hi Guys!
Just a quick foreword from me to welcome you to the all new Sass Pack blog.
Anyone who wishes to contribute can contact any of us as new Sass bloggers are always welcomed! You can pretty much include anything from Silk reviews, weapon (Bow) reviews, short stories, book reviews, Role play tips, Fashion, anything else that might be of interest, be creative!
We will of course be reviewing the open hunts and giving all the gory details...so preds...get your scrubbing gloves out for the ladies! Monthly Pred will also be making a show...want to nominate your pred for 'Pred of the Month?' look out for the poll going around the village and stick his name down and give a good reason!
And last but not least we will have the 'Weekly Blah' a chance to get an insiders view on topics cropping up around the village, Our lovely Sophia will be leading the discussion on the stark differences between a RL M/S relationship and of one in SL very soon...so look out for that and we look forward to your feedback and comments..
Safe paths to all!
Lola
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